Using screens to calm fussy toddlers is linked to increased behavior problems over time and higher parenting stress, according to new research from UC Irvine. While most parents occasionally reach for a phone or tablet to soothe an upset child, a longitudinal study of 210 families suggests this common strategy may come with longer-term trade-offs for children's emotional development.

What Does the Research Show About Screen Use and Toddler Behavior?

Researchers from six universities followed 210 families from when children were 9 to 30 months old, examining how parenting stress, media use, and child behavior interact over time. The study, published in Developmental Psychology, included a racially, ethnically, and economically diverse sample, offering one of the first longitudinal examinations of this relationship.

The findings reveal a concerning pattern. For mothers, higher parenting stress was linked to more frequent use of devices to calm or distract young children. That increased device use was then associated with more behavior problems in toddlerhood, which in turn was tied to heightened parenting stress over time. While the study does not establish direct causation, it highlights how everyday parenting strategies and children's development may gradually influence one another.

Notably, while most parents reported rarely using devices to calm infants, by the time children reached toddlerhood, all parents in the study acknowledged using devices this way at least some days each week.

How Does Screen Use Affect Children's Emotional Development?

The key insight from this research centers on what researchers call "displacement." When digital devices are used to calm or distract children, they may replace opportunities for children to develop self-regulation skills, which are critical for long-term social and emotional development.

"Digital devices are incredibly effective at capturing children's attention, especially when they are upset or bored. But when devices are used to calm or distract children, they may displace opportunities for children to develop self-regulation skills, skills that are critical for long-term social and emotional development," said Stephanie M. Reich, professor of education at UC Irvine.

Stephanie M. Reich, Professor of Education at UC Irvine

Self-regulation refers to a child's ability to manage their own emotions and behavior. When a parent soothes a distressed child through interaction, communication, and emotional support, the child learns to recognize and manage their feelings. But when screens replace these moments, children miss crucial learning opportunities.

"Those everyday interactions are how young children learn to manage their emotions. If those moments are consistently replaced, it may shape development in ways we're only beginning to understand," Reich noted.

Stephanie M. Reich, Professor of Education at UC Irvine

Ways to Support Emotional Development Without Relying on Screens

• Soothing Through Interaction: When your child is upset, try holding them, talking softly, or engaging in calming activities together rather than handing them a device. These moments teach children that emotions can be managed through connection and communication.
• Recognize Parenting Stress: The study found that mothers with higher stress levels were more likely to use screens to calm children. Identifying your own stress triggers and seeking support from partners, family, or professionals can help break the stress-to-screen cycle.
• Create Alternative Distraction Methods: When you need a moment of peace, consider books, toys, or activities that encourage interaction rather than passive screen consumption. These alternatives still provide a break while maintaining opportunities for skill development.
• Involve Both Parents: The research emphasized the importance of understanding how both mothers and fathers use media. Discussing family media strategies with your partner ensures consistency and shared responsibility for supporting healthy development.

Does This Pattern Differ Between Mothers and Fathers?

The study also highlighted important differences in how mothers and fathers use screens with their children. For mothers, higher parenting stress was directly linked to more frequent device use, which then led to behavior problems. For fathers, device use was also associated with children's behavior problems over time, though it was not directly tied to reported stress levels.

This finding underscores the importance of looking at the full family system when understanding how children develop. "Understanding how families use media requires looking at the full family system," Reich explained, suggesting that both parents' approaches matter for child outcomes.

Why Does the "How" of Screen Time Matter More Than Total Time?

Much of the public conversation around children and media focuses on total screen time, but this research points to something different: how and why devices are used. A child watching an educational program while sitting with a parent differs significantly from a child being handed a device as a quick fix for distress.

The distinction matters because it affects what children learn in those critical moments. When a toddler is upset, the interaction that follows shapes their developing brain. If screens consistently replace those interactions, the long-term effects on emotional regulation and behavior may be substantial.

For parents navigating the challenges of early childhood, the takeaway is not that screens are inherently harmful, but rather that how we use them matters. By being intentional about when and why we reach for devices, and by prioritizing face-to-face interaction during moments of distress, parents can support their children's emotional development while also reducing their own stress levels over time.